Wandering an Incredible Life

So, the story starts like this: there’s an Inca, his name is Toni. Toni goes by the Inca Head of the village and tells him: “Inca Head of the village! Listen, listen to me I had a tremendous idea! Why don’t we build a town in the most uncomfortable, inaccessible and unreachable place of all the Andes?” The Inca Head of the village, very wisely, thinks about it a couple of minutes, just what an Inca Head of village is supposed to do, and instead of hurling Toni from the first cliff available in honor of Inti, the god of the sun, answers: “Eh! Why not?”

And after a mass of Incas dead splitting rocks and carrying soil, Machu Picchu is built. There are the agricultural zone, the residential one, the intellectual one, the artisans’ one, the temple, the inn and all the rest. A complete town after all. And absolutely unreachable, just as Toni wanted.

But Toni is not happy yet, and after a while goes back to the Inca Head of the village and tells him: “Inca Head of the village, Machu Picchu is not bad after all but…when I was talking about an uncomfortable, inaccessible and unreachable place, I was talking about that mountain over there, the one with the vertical, sheer and practically unreachable faces. Why don’t we build something over there? Come ooooooooon.” The Inca Head of the village, very wisely, thinks about it a couple of minutes, and instead of sacrificing Toni to the gods, slowly and painfully eviscerating him on the first altar available, answers: “Eh! Alright, come on!”

And after infinity of Incas precipitated in the vacuum and collapsed for the fatigue, Huaina Picchu is built. Three houses on the top of a mountain with vertical faces.

Toni is finally happy, the Inca Head of the village, who is wise, as well. A week later the Spanish come and conquer Incas, that anyway have decimated themselves. But Machu Picchu and Huaina Picchu are left alone because they are too hard to reach.

Five centuries later I come, I wake up at 3 a.m., I walk up 4 billions of steps and at 5 a.m. I’m in front of Machu Picchu. I take the number (56) to go up to Huaina Picchu and I start. After 6 godtrillions of practically vertical steps I remember that I suffer from dizziness, but it’s definitely too late.

Fuck you Toni.